Growing Pains

There are moments in life that make us more aware than ever we are a full fledged responsible adult. I hate those moments.

I’ve droned on about my single life and I do not mind being single. Actually, it’s not being single that I mind. What I mind is being responsible for everything. It breaks, I have to fix it. It wears out, I have to replace it. That’s what gets annoying.

Recently, I had to fly to Dallas for some family time. The upside to the trip was my Mutha took me shopping for bras. That’s what mothers do, they buy your underwear. A friend and I recently were having the conversation that her grown son asked her for underwear, because that’s what mothers do. She also lamented that she missed her own mother at those moments, when she needed new underwear.

Where am I going with this underwear ramble? Recall my weedwacker excursion? This week has felt a little like that, but a tad more personal. I’m boring. I’ve worn the same (not really the same, that would be kind gross) cotton panties for years. Feeling the need to spruce my undergarments, I spent a few hours at the mall inspecting the array of choices available.

I made the required stop at Victoria’s Secret. I’ve never been thrilled with their stuff, but it’s cute and seemingly affordable for what it is. One of the things I dislike about this establishment is that everyone who works there is between 16 and 20 and has a figure like a stick. They have no idea how to respond when I say I don’t want underwear that rides up my ass because that’s what their thong is meant to do. A few minutes later (but in reality felt like an hour) I wandered out with my tiny bag, $25 lighter and 5 panties richer.

I then made my way to a delightful mecca I like to call Nordstroms. I have never regretted a purchase from there. Yes, it costs 2-3 times what I would have paid elsewhere, but it lasts forever and if I don’t like it, they’ll take it back no matter what. The woman in the lingerie department was friendly and was not put off with my specific criteria. I did find a few things that seemed to fit the bill, but my bill here was quite a bit more than at VS. Again, I knew this going in, but have the expectation that this item will be well worth it.

First morning wearing my new skivvies from VS. I’m not half a block from home and sure enough, they end up straight up my backside! If I had more time I probably would have turned around right then. But I ignored it and went on with the next 10 hours. The others will be returned. I think I’ve learned my lesson and will not be returning to VS.

Day 2 of the new pantie experiment, I wore my new Cadillac undies from Nordy’s. There’s a reason one pair costs the same as I spent on 5 at the other place. I put them on and they fit just right and stayed where I put them. I walked and walked and they didn’t move. I sat down, I stood up, still, right where I wanted them.

Now, that I’ve fallen in love with my new Cadillac panties, I just need to figure out how to refinance my home to buy a few more of these. While my favorite new garment is not in the same ball park as La Perla, it’s certainly several steps up from the cotton Jockey’s I’ve been sporting. The joys of being a girl.